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05-17-2008, 09:05 AM
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#1
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"A" inside wireman
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Ocean, NJ
Posts: 4,721
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Why do transformers hum? They don't know the words
A man with a hearing problem walked into a power plant for a tour. He arrived late and had to join the rest of the group already on the tour. The man was reviewing what he had just told the group. He told the group that they wouldn't move on untill they answered this one question: "What is the unit of power equal to one joule per second called?" The man with the hearing problem hadn't heard the question very well, so he raised his hand and asked "What?"
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A Veteran - whether active duty, retired, guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America," for an amount of "up to and including my life."
"One Nation Under God"
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05-17-2008, 09:53 AM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Maine
Posts: 971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by randomkiller
A man with a hearing problem walked into a power plant for a tour. He arrived late and had to join the rest of the group already on the tour. The man was reviewing what he had just told the group. He told the group that they wouldn't move on untill they answered this one question: "What is the unit of power equal to one joule per second called?" The man with the hearing problem hadn't heard the question very well, so he raised his hand and asked "What?"
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This is weak, but better than that:
A mathematician and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The mathematician leans over to the engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The mathematician persists and explains that the game is real easy and lots of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The mathematician, now somewhat agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!" This catches the engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The mathematician asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five-dollar bill and hands it to the mathematician Now, it's the engineer's turn. He asks the mathematician "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down on four?" The mathematician looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers all to no avail. After about an hour, he wakes the engineer and hands him $50. The engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep. The mathematician then hits the engineer, saying, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The engineer calmly pulls out his wallet, hands the mathematician five bucks, and goes back to sleep.
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05-17-2008, 03:54 PM
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#3
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Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 99
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Why are the streetlights (NY) downtown brighter then the ones uptown ?
They are closer to the battery.
__________________
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote!."
- Benjamin Franklin
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05-17-2008, 05:09 PM
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#4
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Former sparky
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: (God's Country) Eastern Shore of VA
Posts: 2,244
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Quote:
Originally Posted by randomkiller
A man with a hearing problem walked into a power plant for a tour. He arrived late and had to join the rest of the group already on the tour. The man was reviewing what he had just told the group. He told the group that they wouldn't move on untill they answered this one question: "What is the unit of power equal to one joule per second called?" The man with the hearing problem hadn't heard the question very well, so he raised his hand and asked "What?"
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WOW dude it must have been a slow week.
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05-17-2008, 10:54 PM
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#5
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"A" inside wireman
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Ocean, NJ
Posts: 4,721
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MechanicalDVR
WOW dude it must have been a slow week.
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I didn't see your name on the board or newsletter, thank you very much. See you at the meeting.
__________________
A Veteran - whether active duty, retired, guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America," for an amount of "up to and including my life."
"One Nation Under God"
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05-18-2008, 05:14 AM
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#6
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Cocoa, FL USA
Posts: 625
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Quote:
Originally Posted by randomkiller
A man with a hearing problem walked into a power plant for a tour. He arrived late and had to join the rest of the group already on the tour. The man was reviewing what he had just told the group. He told the group that they wouldn't move on untill they answered this one question: "What is the unit of power equal to one joule per second called?" The man with the hearing problem hadn't heard the question very well, so he raised his hand and asked "What?"
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Durn it man, you did not heed the advice of that 'other' forum member "What are these inane comments doing on an electricians forum?"
Guess there is no hope for some of us. To each his own . . .
Work'in For That Free Tee . . .
__________________
Be Safe Out there
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05-18-2008, 07:32 AM
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#7
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"A" inside wireman
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Ocean, NJ
Posts: 4,721
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HighWirey
Durn it man, you did not heed the advice of that 'other' forum member "What are these inane comments doing on an electricians forum?"
Guess there is no hope for some of us. To each his own . . .
Work'in For That Free Tee . . .
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Your right I should have listed it as a joke or humor.
__________________
A Veteran - whether active duty, retired, guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America," for an amount of "up to and including my life."
"One Nation Under God"
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05-18-2008, 09:31 AM
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#8
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Cocoa, FL USA
Posts: 625
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Quote:
Originally Posted by randomkiller
Your right I should have listed it as a joke or humor.
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Keep posten 'um 'em, anywhere you like. If we get too far out of line, a moderator will let us know.
Work'in For That Free Tee . . .
__________________
Be Safe Out there
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05-18-2008, 10:09 PM
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#9
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Orlando,Fl.
Posts: 100
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ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZz
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05-18-2008, 10:18 PM
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#10
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Chief Electron Relocator
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Cornpatch USA
Posts: 31,586
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__________________
In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
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05-19-2008, 10:01 PM
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#11
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Senior Moment
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: LA
Posts: 988
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Get Bent
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07-22-2008, 10:05 PM
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#12
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 97
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A man and his dog walked into a club out in Midland and soon found themselves playing poker with a group. The dog took his place at the table, bought his chips and was playing a pretty good game of poker. All of those present were much impressed. One of the players finally turned to another, a wealthy oil rancher who could never win at poker, and suggested that he buy the dog and use him as sort of a playing partner. "He's no good," said the rancher. "Wags his tail every time he gets a good hand."
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07-23-2008, 06:05 AM
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#13
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Maine
Posts: 971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scrooge
A man and his dog walked into a club out in Midland and soon found themselves playing poker with a group. The dog took his place at the table, bought his chips and was playing a pretty good game of poker. All of those present were much impressed. One of the players finally turned to another, a wealthy oil rancher who could never win at poker, and suggested that he buy the dog and use him as sort of a playing partner. "He's no good," said the rancher. "Wags his tail every time he gets a good hand."
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All the good poker playing dogs are in Odessa.
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07-27-2008, 01:13 AM
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#14
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 97
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mountain Electrician
All the good poker playing dogs are in Odessa.
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The people in East Texas believe that the fastest dogs in the world are from West Texas, because the trees are so far apart.
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07-27-2008, 04:14 AM
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#15
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DGFVT
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: VT
Posts: 2,424
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scrooge
The people in East Texas believe that the fastest dogs in the world are from West Texas, because the trees are so far apart.
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Around these parts there are so many trees that by the time a dog has gone more than 10 feet he is squirting blanks. 
__________________
Doubt All Before Believing Anything.......
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07-27-2008, 05:27 AM
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#16
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Maine
Posts: 971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scrooge
The people in East Texas believe that the fastest dogs in the world are from West Texas, because the trees are so far apart.
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I always thought West Texas dogs were fast because they were trying to stay out of a burrito.
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07-27-2008, 09:16 AM
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#17
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Leesburg, VA
Posts: 20,899
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And you know about the gay electrician,
he blows fuses.
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07-27-2008, 11:18 PM
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#18
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 97
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Around these parts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by John
Around these parts there are so many trees that by the time a dog has gone more than 10 feet he is squirting blanks. |
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
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08-01-2008, 12:01 AM
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#19
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 97
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Wrong.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mountain Electrician
I always thought West Texas dogs were fast because they were trying to stay out of a burrito.
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It's the tamales.
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08-01-2008, 05:30 AM
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#20
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Maine
Posts: 971
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scrooge
It's the tamales.
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I love tamales. Especially at Christmas...I know I'll always have something to unwrap.
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