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Working for Family

3K views 14 replies 13 participants last post by  Idaho Abe 
#1 ·
:censored::censored::censored:

So, here's my story....
My brother in law and his wife declared bankruptcy about two years ago, he works, she doesn't, way too much fun with the credit cards. They inherited a peice of property when her father died and needed to put a mobile home on it.

I built a new 200 amp overhead pole, ran a 60 amp subpanel to the well, ran a 20 amp circuit to the pole barn, ran the 200 amp service to the trailer, hooked up the AC unit, and plain worked my but off to help them out. Total cost--under $1000, I doubt it would even cover the material, but when you're helping out family, what do you do?

Now, here's the kick in the balls. Last weekend, I needed to use my truck to move some "stuff". It took me about an hour to get it started becouse the negative terminal on the battery broke, and I was trying to jump start it. After moving "stuff", my wife and I went to her parents house, and there is her brother's Jeep. I felt bad, it was up on a trailer, probably broken (it is pretty old, I thought). I was happy to note that he had suckered somone else into towing to the garage. About then, my brother in law came out to show us his "new" truck. 05 F250 crew cab, 4x4, diesel, leather, power everything.:mad:

That's my horror story, what's yours?
 
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#2 ·
I feel your pain. Hopefully you have learned something about working for family, I did but it was the hard way as well.

My great grandmother died and left her possessions to her children (great aunts and uncles..) including her old house. I was asked to do the service change, and i said "I would rather not" because i already knew i would never hear the end of how much it costs bla bla bla. Well my nice aunt said "we are going to have to have it done and i want you to make money off of it rather than someone else."

So i did it anyway, It took me 6 hours with one of my employee's, i skipped out on a house i was working on and i missed a class that night. This was four years ago, I profited $80 and still to this day hear about how i charged them way to much.

Lesson Learned
 
#3 · (Edited)
Avoid working for family at all costs. Everyone expects you to cut your price because they're 'family'. Family or not, it still costs money to run a business.

Now, that being said, if my parents or brothers call I am there in a heartbeat. I also know that I can pick up the phone and get the same help from them.

Just my opinion.....

Podagrower, I would talk with your brother in law and say, "I see that your financial situation has greatly improved since you now have the resources to purchase this nice truck. I trust you won't have any problems with my sending you a revised bill for the work I did."
 
#4 ·
When you work for family you either have to make up your mind it's for free or else give them a huge price upfront and tell them you are way too busy at work right now.
 
#7 ·
My Story ---

I am also a builder/remodeler, and I my brother in law wanted me to do a huge $300,000 remodel on an investment property.

Long story short, there were a lot of hidden problems (rot, no footings under steps, wet basement, etc.) with the house. And he had me do many extras (Sub Zero, washer dryer, upgrade tile, $10k in landscaping, upgrade trim, etc).

Then he wondered why it didn't come in for the budgeted amount. He ran about $106,000 over budget. I only got $45,000 of the $106,000 after I threatened him with legal action. He's a lawyer BTW.

Haven't said a word to him in 1 1/2 years.
 
#8 · (Edited)
I work for family, I work with family, sometimes I charge family, sometimes I don't.

Examples...next week I'll put a new service on my brothers house, cost 450.00. He's a carpenter, and this summer will help me remodel my bathroom.

His twin is an electrician and works for me. I pay him more than I do other journeyman, but I expect more from him. The rest of my employees punch a clock (figuratively speaking) but he only charges me for productive hours. His idea, not mine. He has cultivated several important accounts, and overall has been a great asset to my company.

We renovated our family home of 125 years on the Maine coast last year. I rewired the entire home for a reduced labor rate and material at cost. At the same time I served as PM, interior designer and general laborer. The company my brother worked for did the carpentry. The end result was a quality job we know was done correctly because we did it. The entire family shared the cost.

Last month, I took 2 weeks and flew to NM to work on my Mom's house. I flew another brother from FL as well, and we busted butt for 10 days doing yard work, light carpentry and some electrical. I paid for all the material, plane tickets, food, rental car and neither my brother or I charged for any labor. She's Mom.

My sister is a doctor, and provides us with free medical advice and referalls to specialists which often turn out to be free or nearly so.

For me and my family, we've always been able to work with each other in a give and take method, with everyone aware that you do your part and help out when you can and in whatever manner your circumstances allow. Works for us.
 
#10 ·
My mother, sister, brothers, and aunts are all for free. I have way too many other relatives to do anymore than that.
 
#11 ·
Here's how I look at it. The choice to help others is mine. The choices they make are theirs. I guess I'll stick with mine.

Had a teacher once -- maybe third grade, told me that a person's abilities -- talents -- are not his alone. That stuck with me. I don't know why.
 
#13 ·
I,also, will do the for free thing for parents, brother, and sister. Most times bro and sis will insist on paying for at least the material. I figure if I can't help family and friends with my skills then what good have I done. Mountain seems to have figured it out with his family. It's good to know family members can get along. Too much animosity and hatred in the world anyway.
 
#14 ·
I figure if I can't help family and friends with my skills then what good have I done.
I think this may be where I made my mistake. I've always helped family--usually my wife's more than my own, but this was just a slap in the face.

Anyways, it gets better...my wife's sister needs a new panel at her house. 200 amp :censored:Federal Pacific:censored: exterior panel. When I told her all I could do was replace it, and it was going to cost $200 for panel and breakers, she said she couldn't afford that. The other night I hear she is looking for a newer car, good for her. Guess who has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap about her panel:thumbup:.
 
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